When two pregnant women meet they hit baby bumps so the fetuses can headbutt each other.

When your baby can’t stop punching and kicking in the womb they can’t fit anymore so pop them out.

I let my imagination run wild when I’m with a naked woman.

What kind of novels do Harlequin ducks make? Romance.

Horsehair extensions give you a great mane.

When a woman cakes on her makeup she’s painting.

What does an audiophile call her nipples? Tweeters.

Why do boobs sag? Because they’re drowsy.

When someone doesn’t look good in a bikini they’re ice cold.

When you go on an instadate with a waitress it’s called take out.