I call my cat Litterbox because that’s where he likes to sleep.
When you kidnap a cat you’re giving them a chance to experience another one of their nine lives.
The correct way to use a pet waste bag is to hold it right behind the dog so the poop falls right in. Just watch out for farts.
A dogs favourite thing to do in a dog park is socializing with the buttholes on his friends.
Do you know why cats scratch at the door when they get home? Because you can’t hear them knock.
When a cat gives me love bites I fall in love with felines.
What’s a cat’s favorite place to sleep? In a knapsack.
I don’t know why some people call cat’s a pussy. I guess they’ve never seen a cat fight.
I don’t know what to do when a dog starts humping my leg so I do martial arts on him.
What do people think when they see a cute dog? Is he going to hump my leg?