When you have a big mouth everyone else thinks it’s a megaphone.
What do you call someone that’s always at the right place at the right time?
An asshole. They’re ruining it for the rest of us.
I love my middle finger. It sticks up for me in fights.
When you take an asshole’s photograph you’re taking a dick pick.
A guy down the street today called me a nice asshole after I mooned him.
I’m tired of assholes shitting all over everybody. I wish they would swallow a box of ex-lax and shit themselves.
When you call someone an asshole there is actually two of them. So call them a double asshole.
What do you call it when you pull the wool over someone’s eyes? The Sweater.
When someone is almost an asshole they’re a Perineum.
Think outside the box, become a dick.