When you have an axe to grind you have an axe to throw.
When you only think bad thoughts it’s a thought spiral.
What is the fetal position called when you’re in pain? A Pile of Poo.
I got over my fear of flying by closing my eyes.
What happens when someone swallows a Tide pod then acts really agitated? They wash their clothes.
I talk so much that my own mouth wants me to shut up.
I’m shy so I hide behind my prescription eyeglasses.
When you feel dead inside, it’s because your heart has stopped.
Whenever I’m really angry I always put my cell phone in airplane mode before I throw it.